Top 20 Funniest Pick-Up Lines For Nurses

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Even nurses know a bunch of silly things, including sidesplitting pick-up lines that you will surely enjoy.

We have searched far and wide, and ended up choosing twenty of the most hilarious amongst the limitless number of pick-up lines for nurses.


1. Are you my appendix? Because I don’t understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.

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2. Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day.

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3. You must be the one for me… Since my selectively permeable membrane let you through.

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4. Are you lost Ma’am? Because heaven is a long way from here.

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5. Did you damage my cerebellum? Because I’m falling all over the place for you.

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6. Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.

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7. You make my dopamine levels all silly.

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8. Are you Broca’s Aphasia? Because you leave me speechless.

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9. You breathe oxygen? We have so much in common.

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10. Blood is red, cyanosis is blue, I get tachycardia when I think of you.

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11. My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in.

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12. I think you are suffering from a lack of Vitamin Me.

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13. Your calves must be aching. Because you’ve been back-marching through my mind all day.

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14. We should get some coffee…  Because I’m liking you a latte.

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15. On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?

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16. Whenever I’m near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration because you take my breath away.

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17. Hey, are you a conditioned stimulus? Because you’re making me drool.

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18. Excuse me, I think you dropped something: My jaw.

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19. You look familiar. Did we have class together? I could have sworn we had chemistry.

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20. Hey girl, you’re like a car accident, because I can’t look away.

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If you’re wondering how these pick-up lines work, it’s about time that you try them on a gorgeous nurse you’ve been eyeing the past few days. You’ll never know unless you try.

Related article: 5 Reasons Why You Should Date a Nurse

You must be very amused reading this list of hilarious pick-up lines for nurses, but trust me, there are a whole lot more. If you have one in mind, don’t be shy—share it with us!


About the Author: Mary Elizabeth Velarmino Francisco earned her Bachelor of Science in Nursing Degree from the Ateneo de Zamboanga University, Philippines. She is always happy to share her passion for writing and blogging. With coffee running through her veins, she enthusiastically battles each day, one article at a time.